You the Cactus

I have dreamed of you,

That this day would come.

I have drowned you,

I have poured too much,

Because it was the only thing I could do.

I could not hold you,

I could not feed you

I could not taste you,

I could not move you.

You are thick,

You are strong,

You are immediate,

You are painful.

But you are a liar.

I know exactly what you're made of.

You are a liar and a fraud,

And so am I.

Foreign Streets

I creep out into the night,
I tread these tires slowly, quietly,
And head for my romance affair with the streets,
These foreign streets.

Oh this is so marvelous,
Their glittering lamps seduce me,
Come hither, a little more, and I do,
Their lines animate me, enact me,
Forward, forward more still, wait and see
Their streetlights lap up my face and body,
Again and again we glide across each other.

The song comes on, rings,
Caresses my ears and lips and neck,
The one about L.A.,
And whispers sweet nothings,
That only a spouse romancer could,
We can do this, we were meant to be,
Don't you worry, just stay with me in this place.

The tires roll off the satin sheet bed,
I grip the wheel to maneuver the asphalt,
The light commands me to stop, I have been here,
The breaks are stiff and weak and scrape,
I pull in to the driveway,
Which taste of ash, reeks of Tilex,
I exit.

The ancient boy is awaiting me at the door, he knows,
He shows me my relic scribbles, still fresh with his crayon snow,
Oh you genius, oh you bastard,
When will you die, you and your foreign streets?

Nonsense Tantamount

When men of stature
Wear these coats of rapture
And stroll themselves into town,

And Jesuit priest
Confide in their beast
And see that their prophecy's profound,

And the Japanese
Cure western disease
And resow their salt stained grounds,

The pianist will cry,
The Christians abide,
And Red Mayhem will witness the dawn.

Battlefields Eternal

Thrice I have been threatened by failed attempts to fly,
But they could not escape me - an event horizon...
Not until I had discharged myself from their payload.

From across the space that I waited,
I took witness to the truthfulness of it.
Between all the silvery machines and off white monitors,
From whence all salvation is administered,
Surely such a Room is desperate when empty - an Emergency indeed.

Entire fleets release their payloads.
Paratroopers we are,
Landing amidst these windy brittle months.

We ready our rifles and worn leather satchels and march.
March forth on the grounds of compulsion constructed,
But through the space between two snowflakes, my reticle falls,
Upon a friend in familiar palm trees basking amidst rays once mine.
His time will come - all is fair in war and it - the Astrologer is wise.

Surely these darkened valleys we march through,
These have always been on the map,
And their conquest is redundant as star circles.

A fact - you will always be alive on these battlefields eternal - the Astrologer does not repent.

The Appointment

We are going to kill the cat today.
His paw comforts her and tells her goodbye,
That all of this is perfect.

Our shopping will be separate today.
She needs a different kind of sustenance.
Our meals will be distanced.
We are not ready.
We cannot share such different sustenance.
I feed upon dead flesh.
She insist upon okra and pumpkin seeds.
She wishes to live smaller.
I intend to die large.

We go to the gym to change ourselves today.
She is lifting weights.
She is removing worries.
I am carrying weights.
I am culminating angst.
She has lived a little longer.
I will die a little more.
She wishes to run, run away a little longer.
I wish to run, run into it a little faster.

The cat will be killed at 5:40pm.
She will shed her tears.
I will use them to cry.
This is perfect.
We do not need to be ready.

Confessions to my Creator

          (To Cheryl)

You poured me out of your flesh
By will or by force
I was there
And you then poured into me
Everything available
And I know that now

Your breaths are silent
But I am aware
Of why you deject their tests
"It lacks quotient and will not live like the others"
But I was your chalice
The one you chose to pour rather than stumble upon

You were harsh, as your lion star said you would be
But the rhythm of your palm against my canvas
Was in perfect synchronous with the necessary march
And the resonance of your roars in my drums
In perfect pitch with the orchestration required
Each tear was a brick

You made me far too human
You made me far too conscious

Then in my own devices I became vacant
I could not read like the others
"Why will it not work?" they begged
For years they begged
And I was silent
And I know it was because of what you poured

When you sent me to the scholars
I know I screamed
I know what you thought of me
But understand it was unavoidable
I was far too human
And far too conscious

Some day I will do what you want of me
I will return to you and say it
That the screaming was apart of the orchestration
All the mistakes were mine
I will say that, but I will not say it yet
That it was the keystone, but not the one you wanted

Sadly, this is where you will weep
Sadly, this is where it began

The too human found the too conscious
And I disintegrated from you
When I was walking away from my peeled car
To pursue plot lines - the only thing I could see
I knew you would despise me and it
You lost who you were in me

I sipped the wines of others
Of Greene and Hawkins
Of Discenna and Marx
Of Allah and Shiva
Of Kant and Confucius
Of Hoeppner and Whitman

All of the words became transparencies
The plot lines became realities
And I knew the world was different
So I challenged you
And you did not know it,
But I had won myself from you entirely

I still know the worry in your eyes
I still know you wish to pour

But I am now me and I understand it
Though they and you do not
"Why are you so cold?" they ask it... they ask me
Because when I grow warm I will burn the world
And you will for the first time hear my prophecy
And they will know me by my craft

They will send their Jesuses against me
And I will fight them off one question at a time
And I hope that some day... some far away day
You will come to understand my Darwin and my Dawkins
And the others of us

Who were far, far too human
Far, far too conscious

Yet I am ashamed to say it to you.

Genesis has Failed Us

Genesis has failed us

The stars lay on path/a spiral/toward black holes while the Angels of Venus wage

     war against the Wolves of Mars for the Throne of Earth yet no earthling exist

     to understand or decide the outcome and Creatures from Andromeda have

     tried to speak to me but the sounds are in nebula where I can not smell things

     I grow weary my teeth are dull from battle with my own kind and with angels I

     want to be beside earthlings and listen to the Creatures but I was built on

     Earth in iron forests where no earthlings exist and it is all countable by

     resources where minds can not be spent

we are inevitable
galaxies are inevitable

Genesis has failed us

Stream of Thought

This Mercedes was earned

But please pray for the soldiers

They are the Utility

May I have the keys?

Sadly, the gnome in the wineglass misconstrued the intentions of geometry

Oops said Virtue

How Awful exclaimed non-existent heaven

When did the Overseer get knocked up?

No, Mr. National, you do not qualify for the stimulus package

Please step inline with the rest of your gnomes

And await your destiny as French Aristocrat of the Christ

The commoners will be missing you

Unfortunately, gnomes of the neglecting-Overseer,

I can not allow you to remain

Though I do understand your love of the dirt and sugar cane

Mr. National will be looking to forget you in the puddles and ruins of capital